The English language? What does it do for you?
Well, think of all those millions trying to learn things like this...

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

When the stars are out, they are visible,
When the lights are out, they are invisible.

How can 'You're so cool' and 'You're not so hot' be different?

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

If brother becomes Brethren, why doesn't mother become Methren?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

How come Writers write but Fingers don't fing?
And Grocers don't groce and Hammers don't ham?

A lone mouse can transform into a whole set of mice,
But it's impossible for a single house to become a whole block of hice.

Although the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, we must be grateful for small mercies of the language that the feminine pronouns after 'She' don't become 'Shis' and 'Shim'.

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which your house can burn up as it burns down,
in which you fill in a form by filling it out
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

We are a strange lot to have noses that run and feet that smell.

If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?

Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllable"?

英語
ภาษาอังกฤษ
الإنجليزية
~~~

Music: Mykel Angel: Hathi Mere Sathi