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Posts archive for: January, 2008
  • Guten morgen, perhaps

    Some desire is necessary to keep life in motion.

    ~Samuel Johnson

    Hello everyone,

    I'm awake to the roaring sound of the wind howling outside within the eddy of hospital buildings. What an ironic name...

    Yesterday I had some scans for my spinal cord and neck, and some physio, traction, and then treatments and injections. I felt euphoria for an hour or so, then deep depression. Being filled up with harder drugs is not a good path to take, but I realise it may be the only one. (I now reterm it, mediSIN.)

    The scan revealed some rather disconcerting news; I will need yet another major spinal operation on February 12th. :(
    I'm just not ready for this, how can it be? Am I still unconscious? This just cannot be happening to me.
    It is a surprise at how soon it is, because usually they 'offer' surgery several months hence, but not this time.

    So that means I'll have to find some more resolve in just two weeks.

    It's got to be better than this, surely....surely...

    Have a lovely day,
    Ed
    xx

    The unexamined life is not worth living.

    ~Socrates

  • still

    Still I see (Nothing)

    Twilight, and another pall of darkness descends
    beneath the revered Oak's bough I await life's threads
    a calling, of spine chilling wintry frequence
    am I lost? Yes, most definitely a numbing maelstrom
    I care not for the grey area of this malignant outcome
    for the heart reels again and again in the hours of absence

    thirteen minutes past six and still nothing's flown
    this junction of a heavily congested emotional zone
    no guesses as to why, and no key for hope to imply
    memories remain on the bench, now the game's nearly over
    ninety minutes have flown by, without extra-time for the younger-
    half of me, unto the tournament of life instigating reasons why

    working on the basis of memory, is that hope enough?
    life and death are twins of our very being which we cannot rebuff
    continually looking into our subconsciousness and daily torsion
    no positive way to turn when the pull of loss is so intense
    falling to four or five degrees with no more warmth left to dispense
    it's now dark, calm, heartbeats fade through an unknown curtain

    a sequacious passing surprisingly benign as if nothing's happened
    where on earth am I? nature's healing talent has deadened
    picturesque souvenirs, ethereal tints, a paraph unseen
    the human touch raised with motherly tenderness
    without which life becomes a skyward finial so aimless
    what I now 'see' is a moment of icy stillness unforeseen.

    by wensum24
    ©2008wensum24

  • Money is, money was

    Because of the crisis in the world today that is
    causing people to worry about stocks, bonds, loans,
    credit, inflation and the value of money several of my
    close internet friends (and a few of my everyday
    friends here) have been talking to me about their own
    financial situation. A few are asking for advice.

    Contemplating all of this I realized very few
    understand any of this at all. So, here, as short as
    I can make it, off the top of my head, are some
    answers, and, some good advice.

    LESSON ONE

    For thousands of years as a human culture would
    develop and a government to oversee that culture would
    get established those in power realized that something
    would need to be created to act as a symbol of the
    effort placed through labor into the production of
    "goods", and, that symbol would also need to represent
    the value of those goods produced by that labor.

    Money is a created thing. From nothing, a ruler says,
    this symbol represents your value. Use this symbol to
    declare your value is promoted by the ruler.

    The rulers would then cause these symbols to be mass
    produced. When the rulers bought things or ordered
    people to work for them they would "pay" for these
    things with these symbols. Thus these symbols would
    filter out into the hands of private persons. Those
    citizens would use the symbols themselves. Bartering
    for labor or for goods was replaced with symbols of
    worth.

    Rule #1 - Money is just a symbol, and, what gives it
    power is the belief by those using the symbols that
    they have a firm value.

    Rule #2 - When this belief gets stressed out because
    of trouble touching the lives of the people within a
    given culture these symbols of worth change in value.

    Rule #3 - When a society fails so do these symbols
    fail. Eventually every monetary system from history
    eventually failed and those money symbols became
    worthless.

    Rule #4 - Eventually the symbols used today as money
    by every varied culture on earth will fail and become
    worthless.

    The question today that needs to be asked by everyone
    is this. How do I protect myself from financial
    failure? What are the things I can do to help insure
    when symbols of worth are in trouble because of events
    within my culture that I also will not get into
    trouble?

    I will try to simplistically explain the truth
    everyone needs to know and also reveal an ancient
    hidden secret of how someone can easily secure their
    economic future. (hint - DO NOT GAMBLE - INVEST IN
    SOMETHING THAT IS NOT JUST A SYMBOL)

  • Scanning the day ahead

    Morning dear friends,

    I enjoyed the sunlight of yesterday, and the sunbeams coming off kiki's Lisboa blog, as today is truly and utterly...cloudy here.

    I've to have a busier day than expected, with a neck scan later this morning, and an in depth look at the 'workings of my spine', so I'm told. This is fine, but I become fearful when doctor's jump from one thing to another like this, as it becomes an avalanche of emotion for little me, the patient.

    I keep on having dreams of my childhood in France, with my late Grandfather taking care of me...indeed I now realise in the sobering light of day, that my dream contained all my dearly departed family members, some of whom I still cannot bring myself to admit have 'gone.

    Have a lovely day dear friends.

    Love,
    Ed
    xxx

    PS: I must give credit to Norwich City's wonderful victory last night, winning 1-0 at Southampton brings to 10 the number of unbeaten games we've had. B)

  • Home insulation??

    A farmer built an entire mock castle behind a screen of hay bales and lived there concealed for four years to evade planning regulations, officials said on Friday -- but it may be torn down anyway.

    Robert Fidler hopes to take advantage of a provision of planning law that allows buildings without planning permission to be declared legal if no objections have been made after four years
    But Reigate and Banstead Borough Council in Surrey is not impressed.

    "It does not count because the property was hidden behind hay bales," said a spokeswoman. "No one knew it was there."

    The council wants the building near Redhill some 30 km south of London to be demolished, along with an associated conservatory, marquee structure, wooden bridge, patio, decking and tarmac racecourse.

    "It looks like a mock-Tudor house from the front and it's got two turrets at the back," the spokeswoman said. "I understand there is also a cannon."

    The couple would have been unlikely to get planning permission as the farm was in "green belt" land where building was restricted, she said. A hearing takes place in February.

    Fidler's wife Linda told the Daily Mail newspaper the children grew up looking at straw out of the windows of the house and that they kept their son away from playschool on the day his class were due to do paintings of their houses.

    "We couldn't have him drawing a big blue haystack," she said. "People might ask questions."

    Planning inspectors had been called to the site by concerned neighbours shortly before Fidler took the hay bales down in summer 2006 but had not seen the house.

    "When the inspectors went there, all they saw was hay bales and hay bales on agricultural land are not that unusual," the spokeswoman said.

    "I think the neighbours thought there might be something going on but it is difficult to tell, isn't it?"

  • Absurd phrases and possible answers (to nothing!!)

    Being in here, sick, week after week, I get these phrases hurled around time and time again...

    This won't take a minute. (The minute hand is a two-ended sword)

    I beg your pardon. (If it be royal, then no, you may not!!)

    It's certain that it may rain. (It's definitely probable and quite likely that you're just about going to be right.)

    I wasn't going to say anything, but... (In my hour of silence, let me say...)

    Act your age (But time passes so fast, how can I??)

    I told you so (But only when I wasn't around eh??)

    I don't wish to change the subject, but... (Is this a question of subject matter??)

    Why can't you be more like (---)... (Oh if only >:-(

    Is that all you've got to say for yourself? (Unless more magical words have popped-out, yes, that is all.)

    I'm hopping mad... (I'm in stitches~~ :P ~~)

    Now, I don't know how to tell you this, but... (Oh well, if you don't know how to tell me, then how can I listen?)

    Are you sure you've done this before? (Well, now you come to mention it, I'm having second thoughts)

    I'm having second thoughts about this. (Are you sure you've done this before??)

  • Motherly Times

    I hear you now, as I had hoped for so long
    a hearts enclave seemed but a dream away
    until today wakened the spirit in me
    a touch of reassurance for memories to play;
    a hazy sun's disportment where my hopes lay strong,
    motherly nature is my axiology for living everyday

    Like soft Anglian winds and broad skies
    lasting forever, endlessly playing upon my mind
    fields stretch like buntings from emotional bows
    here is the last place I ever expected to find
    overtly free is the blood with an element of surprise
    for you gave me light in our worlds intertwined

    'why' need not ask any more questions of truth
    for the meaning is imbedded into life and death
    both answer to all or nothing, and we between
    so what does it take to summon a last breath
    only a mother can bestow upon us eternal youth
    so when such days shall pass, I wait with bated breath.

    © 2008wensum24

  • What?

    Body: A thing of shreds and patches, borrowed unequally from good and bad ancestors and a misfit from the start.
    - Ralph Waldo Emerson

    Happy Sunday to you all,

    It's sunny, clear, and very mild outside here in Norwich.
    While listening to Liverpool's astonishingly abject display against a beautifully spirited Havant & Waterlooville I noticed a 'fall' in my own health too.
    Sorry to continually write about my cursed health, but overnight I needed emergency assistance due to the damaged stomach lining and related problems. During the night it felt like a one foot needle was passing through a place that should only pass water, and nearly knocked me out...I was sweating like crazy and in extreme pain, and thankfully help came an hour after the symptoms begun. I'm all tubed up now, being monitored and have no idea where I am, or what it is that happened. The hours after 11pm do not register right now.

    Well, I surely wish you a great day, and happy wishes to you all.

    Love,
    Ed
    xx

    Linkin Park: "What I've Done"

    Take care of your body with steadfast fidelity. The soul must see through these eyes alone, and if they are dim, the whole world is clouded.
    - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

  • Please, please tell me now (Is there something I should know??)

    Is there something under the surface that we have missed, or have we not evolved enough to 'unearth' what we always have felt is life 'out there'?

    Do you believe there is something, as yet, beyond our comprehension?

    I think it is a classic case of the mind 'stretching' itself, when we enter into such thoughts of an area we have never discovered; the universe rather like our own brains, so much apparently there, but as yet unused, unseen, unknown, undiscovered...

    astronomers think they've discovered a whole lot of nothing. In the constellation Eridanus, near Orion, some 10 billion light-years from Earth, there appears to be a vast expanse of empty space, completely devoid of matter--no stars, no planets, no black holes, no gases, not even any dark matter. It's almost a billion light-years across, more than sixty times larger than any previously known cosmic void.

    The void's discoverers--Lawrence Rudnick of the University of Minnesota, his collaborator Liliya R. Williams, and his graduate student Shea Brown--already knew the region was unusual because cosmic microwave background radiation (ubiquitous faint radio waves left over from the big bang) appears much weaker there than elsewhere in the cosmos. Then the team's analysis of data from the Very Large Array radio telescope in New Mexico eliminated the possibility that the region's microwave signal was being obscured by radio waves from nearby galaxies: there are just too few "radio galaxies" in the vicinity to do the job.

    The remaining possibility was empty space, which could also weaken the signal--thanks to the effect of omnipresent dark energy. Rudnick's calculation of the void's colossal size is based on the apparent weakness of the radiation. (Astrophysical Journal)

  • Broke is broke

    Hello friends,

    My little phone has been sounding the tune of sales for one week now, without more than an hour's break, I get repeated recorded sales from somewhere or other, the first of which 'stole' a great chunk off my credit. I have got so tired of this type of thing that I don't bother answering anymore, why can't they leave me alone.

    WHEN I SAY I'M BROKE...I'M BROKE

    A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
    " Good morning, " said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."
    "Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!" and she proceeded to close the door.
    Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. "Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration." And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. "If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."
    The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a damned good appetite, because they cut off my electricity this morning."

  • Necking the pain

    Friday!!
    How's it going for you all dear friends, and what plans do you have...do tell? :)

    I'm hearing Panjabi MC from across the wards, which is most pleasing actually.

    Today I have unearthed something a bit creepy, and very disconcerting indeed. Last autumn, when things were taking an about-turn for the worse, a doctor had requested "urgent treatment" to my neck, which was, and still is, having dreadful problems due to the 4 fractures of the spine. To this day I am unable to turn my head left, and not very far right either, which sounds quite political but isn't!!

    Well, this doctor was quite right, of course, but the hospital have failed to listen, or failed to receive the said request, because I never had treatment to the neck. Now, it may have 'set' forever for all I know.

    There's no point me crying over spilled calpol now, as I made it out of the comotose state, and what with loosing family members, I've had several reality checks, more than enough to make me appreciate even being able to type, let alone laugh, eat, or breathe.

    My father gave me a lovely illustrated copy of Kilvert's Diary, filled with paintings of old England, and many nature paintings as well...what a joy this is for me right here, right now. Just a book...but it not only opened from the cover onwards, it opened my eyes, and unlocked another door that must have waited until becoming rusted and swollen...however, despite the creaking, it duly opened for me, and something brighter has appeared, in a warmly hue...and I am hoping to learn from it.

    Take care, and enjoy your weekend everyone.

    Love,
    Ed
    xx

    PS: Just as I sign off, I have heard from some other source, "The Archers" theme blowing memorially across the wards. ;)

  • 24 weather forecasting 'facts'

    As it's Burns Night, I am reminded of a well-loved-but-not-always-right weather forecaster from the north, Ian McCaskill*...and so, to continue the weather theme, here are 24 weather forecasting facts;

    1. If there's a 50-50 chance that a forecast will go wrong, 9 times out of 10 it will.

    2. No matter how the forecast turns out - there's always another forecaster who "knew it would"

    3. The forecaster who "knew it would happen that way", never told anyone else about it before hand.

    4. The unwritten forecast is always the one that verifies best.

    5. No two weather patterns are alike, although someone will remember one just like this that occurred back in '84.

    6. Prog charts are like clocks:
    ...if you only have one, you always know exactly what time it is.
    ...if you have more than one - you're never sure.

    7. Time savers don't.
    Work savers won't.
    Short cuts aren't.

    8. A storm will develop only after it has been forecasted for several Days... then not mentioned.

    9. Heavy snow will generally end once a winter storm warning has been issued.

    10. Rules of thumb work best on someone else's shift.

    11. You never notice the "glitch" in the forecast wording until after you've pressed the enter button.

    12. No matter how far in advance you forecast a significant storm, the media will always call it unexpected.

    13. When in doubt:
    ...mumble a lot
    ...talk with food in your mouth
    ...change the DTG and reissue

    14. Additional newly found data will always screw up a good analysis.

    15. Always pass the buck to the shift that you just relieved (or to the Hub).

    16. I don't care what guidance says - I always make up my forecast while I'm driving to work.

    17. Total confusion frequently results in outstanding performance.

    18. Murphy's law: the disk you needed more data from... you just erased.

    19. If you get a "gut feeling" about a forecast - its probably heartburn.

    20. When writing a forecast discussion make it so long that no one will bother to read it.

    21. Never say "NEVER"

    22. If everything in the office worked as well as the fridge and microwave, this would be a great place to work!

    23. Bribing the observer will only be tolerated from just before, until just after verification times.

    24. Remember - all extended forecasts fall into the realm of make believe stuff.

    *Ex-RAF meteorologist Ian McCaskill was TV's cuddliest little Scotsman. His lilting Glasgow accent and enthusiasm as he bounced about in front of the blue screen made everyone feel in a sunny mood, no matter what the forecast. McCaskill's receding hairline, thick-rimmed glasses and bushy eyebrows made him ripe for parody, from Rory Bremner to Spitting Image, but he was affectionally regarded by everyone and his retirement in 1998 marked a great loss to BBC's weather team.

  • The Science of well-weathered innuendo undefined.

    A lesson in factual meteorological terms, and not to be assumed otherwise. ;)

    22. Virga (tails of water, drops or ice coming from a cloud)

    21. Hoarfrost

    20. Steam Fog

    19. Heat Wave

    18. Wedge

    17. Overshooting Top

    16. Warm Push

    15. Barber Pole

    14. Rotating Head

    13. Choking Downdraft

    12. Mammatus Clouds

    11. Vertically Erect System

    10. Orogenous Zone

    9. Haboob

    8. Rear-end Inflow

    7. Bulging Top

    6. Moist Tongue

    5. Suction Vortices

    4. Dry Slot

    3. Wet Bulb

    2. Panhandle Hooker

    1. Beaver Tail

  • Is it my imagination, or have I finally found something worth living for?

    I have never smoked an entire cigarette in my life, and probably puffed on about three or four maximum. Both my parents smoked when I was a child, and at times, quite heavily. It had no effect on me really, as I simply wasn't at all interested in smoking.

    When a teenager at school, and after, all my friends smoked, which was never a problem, I was the only one who didn't...my friends knew it, I knew it, end of story.
    My grandparents smoked too, as did all my uncles, cousins etc.
    My first job was in a small working office, measuring only 16x20, and three of my colleagues smoked whilst working in a paper office, up until 1990, causing the ceiling to almost disappear due to the haze...I never cared particularly, and nor would I change it if I could go back.

    So, as a complete non-smoker, I have tremendous sympathy for those that do, who are being hounded out of society as if there is no tomorrow. While people are being murdered on a daily basis in Britain, the PC police are spending hours upon hours a day working for the common "good" to stamp out smoking, even after dark, in people's own back yards.
    This, I feel is disgraceful. Can't our bloody governments wake up and see the reality of fear in our society...cigarettes are not going to kill us as quickly as a druggy with a knife and no remorse.
    When the minister whose job it is to tackle crime publically admits that she is frightened to go outside, we know we've got problems.

    We must fight to defend out liberties, before faceless, nameless political leaders with sickly edicts steal all from us.
    We MUST speak out and speak up!!!!

    The following article caught my eye, because I think there is a deep moral to be found, as France is a country I know very well indeed.

    France has banned it's Frenchness

    The reams of news stories on the new French ban on smoking in cafes, restaurants and night spots have invariably focused on the aura of glamour those little death sticks once conveyed. In newspapers around the globe, nostalgic descriptions of the likes of Coco Chanel or Albert Camus taking a luxurious drag on a cigarette have been, um, de rigueur.

    But to focus on the diminished allure of the cigarette is to miss the significance of the French banning the most cinematic of sins. No, it's not that the French gave the cigarette -- the "little cigar" -- its name or that the plant's active ingredient was named after Jean Nicot, the diplomat who introduced tobacco to the royal court of France in 1559. Rather, it's the role the French have played in the world's imagination.

    Just as California, which imposed the first public smoking ban in 1994, has long been a symbol of clean living, France -- land of wine, women and rich food -- has been the global model of elegant indulgence and well-choreographed excess.

    Particularly to the guilty, austere American mind, France has served as a sophisticated and less uptight oasis in a way that other more illicit and gritty getaways -- think Tijuana or New Orleans -- could not. It is the French who have given us terms for the things we lust after but rarely indulge in -- like femmes fatales or ménages à trois. They have been the baroque to our utilitarian sensibility. And by example, they have given us the sense that there is more to life than work, and that some "sins," ritualized and accepted, may protect us against even more destructive cycles of self-denial and excess.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not defending the glories of smoking. I have never smoked a cigarette in my life. I even agree wholeheartedly with smoking bans in workplaces and restaurants. But I do find it absurd when smoking is banned in nocturnal haunts where adults commonly repair to imbibe known-to-be toxic beverages and otherwise indulge in (lightly) supervised, socially acceptable self-abuse.

    That old font of American wisdom, Ben Franklin, once said that "sin is not hurtful because it is forbidden, but it is forbidden because it is hurtful." In the U.S., contemporary public health specialists and moralists don't employ the word of God to stamp out sin, but they do rally around the notion of the common good. They single out particular evils that they believe deserve to be suppressed at all costs. Think temperance and prohibition.

    The French, on the other hand, with their traditional and vaunted tolerance of sensual indulgence, seemed to have known all along that such attempts to suppress hurtful things can itself be, well, unhealthy. In France, children as young as 5 may be allowed to sip wine at dinner, and so become acquainted with alcohol as an accompaniment to food. That may account for the fact that French kids aren't often caught binge drinking as kids are in Britain and the U.S., countries that have traditionally harbored puritanical attitudes toward drink. As our experiment in prohibition proved, we know only too well how draconian moral legislation can provoke behavioral backlash.

    For the record, I think all those romantic images of Jean-Paul Belmondo wreathed in cigarette smoke are old and tired. As far as I'm concerned, the French government should encourage its citizens to quit smoking. And I'm all for any government putting reasonable limits on public access to smoke and drink, particularly when children are concerned.

    But when France begins to over-legislate adult personal behavior aux americains, it may be denying its own brand of wisdom: We all need to be a little bad once in awhile. The smoking ban in France suggests that the French have forgotten the sage words of one of its greatest smokers: "If I satiate my desires, I sin but I deliver myself from them," wrote Jean-Paul Sartre. "If I refuse to satisfy them, they infect the whole soul."

    Watch out Britain! Next it will be drinkers, with PM Brown's increased taxes on alcohol, to 'protect our health' of course!

  • Time...

    Time,
    it passes so fast,
    if...
    you could fast forward
    or rewind,
    which would you do?

    Would you wish to move ahead to reach your goal, or return to a past time, to rewrite something, or attend to an 'unfinished sentence'?

    Which would you choose to do?

  • Economies and generations

    The news aint good, and after hearing the economic forecasts, I read this (below), which made me think of how nervy everyone's going to be in the coming months...a food for thought article;

    This current economic bad news is the beginning of a
    roller coaster like decline. There may be gains along
    the way, but, not enough. The slope is downhill. The
    world markets are in real trouble. If the US dollar
    suffers a major devaluation in the year 2008 it will
    ripple across the world.

    For decades the modern expansion of societies has been
    built on credit. Modern roads, airports, military
    expansion by big countries has been done on credit.
    The real trouble started when international banking
    worked hard to get the common man deeply into debt
    also it created a ticking time bomb.

    The last 30 years has seen a wave of public
    consumerism purchasing a standard of living based upon
    debt. Houses, cars, electronics, extravagant
    vacations, air travel, etc. Huge loans on homes.
    Credit card debt. Now people are using credit cards
    in grocery stores and gas stations.

    Common "middle class" people have developed a standard
    of living that when I was a child only the very very
    rich could attain to. This living standard expansion
    both by private citizens and the upgrading of
    government services built around this debt has been so
    foolish.

    The tipping point has been reached. Today on earth
    people and governments owe more money in paper debt
    than all the cash money combined that exists in all
    the banks on earth. (this is a fact)

    The value of paper money is based only on faith.
    Where does paper money come from? How does it get
    into the vaults of banks? What determines it's worth
    in buying power? It is an artificial system.

    For thousands of years wealth was backed by diamonds,
    gold, silver etc. Something that could not be
    artificially created by mans hand was true wealth.
    Over the last hundred years since governments realized
    they could just print money this coming disaster began
    to be put into place.

    In history when one country collapsed and it's money
    became worthless the damage was confined to one
    region, one set of local banks, one culture.

    Now, the whole earth is tied together in this modern
    world. Banking is international. Business
    development is international. Borrowing for expansion
    is international. Debt is everywhere. You see
    teenagers carrying credit cards.

    A bad economic collapse is no longer regional. Now it
    can sweep across the planet effecting all people in a
    matter of hours.

    The price for the worlds high standard of living is
    coming due and people do not have the ACTUAL wealth to
    pay the bill. Failure to pay on loans is sweeping
    across the planet. This will cause the artificial
    paper money to be unwanted. It's buying power is
    based upon peoples faith in it. If powerful note
    holders do not get paid it stops the availability of
    credit. Without credit the daily interaction of
    commerce in the modern world can shrink to almost
    nothing in a matter of days.

    Imagine if the oil producing countries suddenly said,
    "pay us with real precious items like gold and
    silver", what would happen?

    I hope this brief explanation helps you understand why
    we are all in trouble.

    Soon a handful of truly wealthy people, those with no
    debt and they own in hand diamonds, platinum, gold and
    silver etc, they will be able to buy things for
    "pennies on the dollar" buying when paper money
    collapses.

    Slowly over hundreds of years the planet has developed
    small groups of people who own the real wealth. This
    next collapse will allow them to become extremely wealthy. Their storehouses of gold and silver will go
    up in value so dramatically that they will be like
    SUPER KINGS of the earth.

    Before the coming total collapse happens anyone who
    can get out of debt, sell off stocks and bonds and
    convert to real storage of precious metal will set up
    the ability to survive economically.

    A worldwide economic depression is on the near
    horizon.

    I recommend going into internet searches and read
    articles about "economic depression" and the real
    value of gold and silver. Study the 1928-29 economic
    collapse and what followed in societies across the
    planet including America.

  • Ups and downs of Premier league health...

    ...Championship contender

    Afternoon all,

    It's cloudy here again, surprise surprise.

    Last night was a particularly gruelling one for yours truly, with blood pressure reaching levels capable of causing strokes, and a stomach unable to deal with any kind of food, least of all hospital grub.
    I was sedated and slept, out cold, until around 7am. The first thing I remember about today was a peculiar 'spiced' pain in my stomach, which is, apparently, a side-effect of some spectacularly powerful medicine administered last evening.

    My blood pressure is still dreadful, but nothing like as bad as was...

    Friends, I mentioned The Lightning Process before didn't I, well, thanks to your help and my own researches here, I am able to get NHS help in the form of CBT, (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), which may trigger some optimism in my depleted system.
    Though I am not in the catagory of being out and out depressed, I am very down due to grieving, and suffering with hospital-related problems for too long, so this may help in the short-term. I certainly hope so.

    Take care everyone.
    Love,
    Ed
    xx

    If the relationship functions, then there is nothing to talk about.
    If the relationship doesn't function, then there is still nothing to talk about.

  • Hello campers...

    ...hope your day has been good?

    This has been a battle for me, to withstand the pain, and to fend-off the threat of 'going under' once again.

    My blood pressure rocketed today once more, touching 222/112 at one point. I remember feeling a waterbreak sensation in my head, on the left side, and an intense pain all the way to my feet, rendering me stupified and eventually knocking me out. Nothing new, but something I thought, and hoped, could be left to the past.

    Writing is my defence against losing control and falling away, it is my key, my note, my window, my imagination, my vision, my call, my voice, my hope.

    Take care all.
    Love,
    Ed
    xx

  • Slow, slow, quick, quick, slow

    Physicists have found that one erratic driver can cause a traffic jam.

    Most traffic jams have an obvious cause. Sometimes it is a blocked lane or a bottleneck on a multi-lane highway. An exit or entry lane can disrupt the flow as cars slow down to leave or to let others onto the road. A hill can bring things grinding to a halt behind a slow-moving lorry. Now a Japanese physicist reports in the journal Physical Review E1 that a jam can also result from a more insidious factor: a single driver whose speed fluctuates unpredictably.

    Computer models are now used to predict the traffic flow pattern in some cities, with data from a few monitoring stations. In a typical traffic model, each vehicle tries to accelerate to a certain desired speed, and modifies its speed in response to the vehicles ahead with a certain response time and sensitivity to change.

    These models indicate that a wide range of behaviour is possible, depending on the volume of traffic -- defined by the density of vehicles and their average speed. At low volume, cars move more or less independently, achieve their preferred speed, and change lanes at will. At high volume, the smallest disturbances trigger a jam of slow-moving or even stationary traffic.

    At intermediate volumes, the flow may become 'provisionally stable'. Small local perturbations to the flow die away. Larger ones amplify into a jam. Congested regions can be pinned to the point of disturbance, for example extending back from an exit lane, or they can travel in waves back down the flow.

    All of this is reasonably well understood, and may help traffic planners to design speed restrictions and junctions that minimize jams.

    But Takashi Nagatani of Shizuoka University in Japan has identified a new hazard: the 'fluctuating vehicle'. He says that on a one-lane highway, a single car within a stream of traffic can send waves of congestion propagating down the line behind it simply by varying its speed, even if it maintains the same average speed as the rest of the flow.

    This kind of driver is quite common. The parent distracted by children who then accelerates to catch up with the vehicles ahead; the tired lorry driver whose attention is wandering; the ageing car that struggles on small inclines but makes up for it downhill -- could all show greater speed variations than the rest of the traffic.

    Nagatani's model indicates that the transitory increase in traffic density behind this car, as others slow down to compensate (or maybe just to keep a cautious distance), can grow into a persistent cluster of dense traffic that moves backwards relative to the fluctuating vehicle. And that it soon becomes unclear that the one caused the other.

    The erratic car can trigger a whole train of these density waves, which move upstream like shock waves. The situation worsens as the average speed of the flow (which is the fluctuating car's average speed too) slows. First, the waves of congested traffic grow until the traffic is more like a fully congested flow with occasional regions of low-density traffic. Then, for still slower speeds, even these 'free flow' regions vanish, and a jam of congested traffic propagates backwards behind the fluctuating vehicle -- which, because its average speed is still the same, is probably oblivious to the chaos it is leaving in its wake.

    So in medium traffic, says Nagatani, a single individual driving erratically enough can induce most of the jamming usually seen only in heavy traffic.

    Philip Ball

    I just had the thought, in Britain at least, with so many speed cameras EVERYWHERE, isn't it more likely for us ALL to slow down in unison causing our daily 600+ mile tailback? :)

  • Learning curve of medical practice...

    Some medical students thoughts and answers on the practice of medicine;

    General:

    "The body consists of three parts - the brainium, the borax, and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax, the heart and lungs; and the abominable cavity, the bowls, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."

    Respiration:

    "When you breathe, you inspire. When you do not breathe, you expire"
    "Respiration consists of two acts: first inspiration, then expectoration."

    Cardiovascular:
    "The three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, veins, and caterpillars."

    Gastrointestinal:
    "The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Alabama."

    Dentistry:
    "A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors."

    Orthopaedics:
    "The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat on."

    Reproductive medicine:
    "Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull."
    "To prevent contraception, wear a condominium."
    "Many women believe that an alcoholic binge will have no effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception."

    Haematology:
    "Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative."

    Eyes and nose:
    "To remove dust from the eye: pull the eye down over the nose."
    "For nosebleeds, put the nose lower than the body until the heart stops."
    "For a cold: use an agoniser to spray the nose until it drops in your throat."

    First aid:
    "For fainting: rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above the head instead. Or put the head between the knees of the nearest doctor."
    "For asphyxiation: apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead."
    "For drowning: climb on top of the person and move up and down to make artificial perspiration."

    Survival Test...

    If lost in the wilderness. Take viagra and an iron supplement. This will turn you into a perfect compass.

  • Musical Healing

    Good afternoon dear friends,

    Here in Norfolk it is dull and wet, with absolutely no hint of a sun existing at all...the fifth successive day of such weather, and as such, wearing a bit thin.

    It's no secret that my health has been the dominating factor in my life this past year, nearly taking my life more than once.
    Now that I am just, only just, beginning to come to terms with M.E. and other physical limitations rendered by the spinal fractures, I found solace in the one thing that has always been a deep love of mine, supplying comfort and hope throughout hardships, that of MUSIC and all it's power.

    As society now views me disabled, music has become my society with which to communicate, interplay, and glean as much inspiration as is possible from it's many beautifully entwined spheres of breathtaking adventure.

    The small list below is one with which I have enormous empathy, and found Sound Feelings, (from where this list is taken), of great help to me this week, a week of mourning.

    My choice of music to help me, has been today, Cafe Goa: Shanti Chillout (2007).
    This morning I felt a total 'void' within me, something that is so hard to explain, but it is like stepping outside one's shell and looking in silence at what the first self wishes to do next, but is unable to find a way forward. This, I'm learning, is the onset of M.E.

    Have a lovely day. :yes:

    Love,
    Ed
    xxx

    1 Select Appropriate Music.

    Most of us choose music that we “like” but will this give us the best results? In fact, often the music we are least attracted to will have the greatest benefit (when played in the right sequence). Let’s say you are very angry. So your first instinct is to put on some really angry music. Does it really help, or does it kind of perpetuate how you feel? Yet, on the other hand if you play some light and happy music, by comparison to how you are currently feeling, it will probably make you feel angrier! As you see, selecting music is not a simple one-shot process.

    2 Consider Music Sequencing.

    Sometimes it is necessary to first choose music that totally matches your current mood rather than the mood you wish to acquire. Consider arranging a series of different musical compositions in sequence that are customized just for your needs. For example, if you are dealing with depression, select a composition which represents depression in its extreme form, to you. Follow this with one that is only mildly depressing. Then select a neutral composition, and end with a composition which is clearly uplifting and motivating. Listening to music in a sequence like this allows for your current stress level or mood to be first honored and then to be gradually transformed.

    3 Speakers Are Ideal.

    It is ideal to listen to the music through speakers rather than headphones so that the cells of the body themselves may “listen” to the sound.

    4 Prepare Yourself to Listen.

    Take off your shoes. Stand relaxed, sit or lie down and breathe.

    5 Listen All the Way Through.

    It is preferable to listen to the musical composition all the way through, without interruption. This allows for the optimum response to the transformation process.

    6 Foreground, Not Background.

    We all have the tendency to use music for the background of other activities. Try developing the technique of just listening to the music, not doing anything else. This way, you will get the best benefit.

    7 Your Response is What is Important.

    It is through your response that the emotional/cellular memory may be released. Do not think that you have to just stay still and concentrate on the music! In fact, if the music inspires you to get up and do something or your mind begins to wander, allow, allow, allow! Allow all responses without judgment. On the other hand, do not begin listening to the music while you are already doing other unrelated activities. The important thing is to let the music embrace you totally.

    8 Listen Actively, Not Passively.

    Allow the music to reach your inner feeling, and respond freely to it. Everyone has a different manner of expression. You may experience visual images, thoughts, movement, an intensification of emotion, physical vibrations, sleep, or nothing at all.

    9 Observe Mind/Body Connection.

    A lot of research has been done recently showing that there is a definite connection between the mind and the body. (Actually this refers to the emotions too but it sounds succinct to say “mind/body.”) Even though music healing is often related to relaxation and emotional issues, there is the likelihood that this indirectly could have a benefit on physical illnesses as well.

    10 Enjoy the Silence!

    When the music stops, it is suggested that you bask in the silence for many moments. This will help integrate the feelings.

    11 Use a Journal.

    If you wish to record your progress in a journal, it can be helpful, but not necessary.

    Sound feelings

  • Oh Heavens! (19th Century Rest in Please)

    Whilst having myself to deal with death in the family, I'm trying to lighten the weight by distracting my hurt and grief by seeing some amazing, tragic, and unbelievable deaths in history...

    1830: William Huskisson, statesman and financier, was crushed to death by the world's first mechanically powered passenger train (Stephenson's Rocket), at its public opening.

    1834: David Douglas, Scottish botanist, fell into a pit trap accompanied by a bull. He was gored and in all probability crushed.

    1868: Matthew Vassar, brewer and founder of Vassar College, died in mid-speech whilst delivering his farewell address to the College Board of Trustees.

    1884: Allan Pinkerton, detective, died of gangrene resulting from having bitten his tongue after stumbling on the sidewalk.

    1899: French president Félix Faure died of a stroke while receiving oral sex in his office.

  • For Kiki

    "Viva Forever"

  • Cantaloupe

    I'm not doing so good dear friends, but holding my own...just.

    I'm amazed at the offerings of food now available in hospital. It certainly has improved since last year, in some part due, no doubt, to the questionaire's we all filled-up regarding hospy munchies~~~~

    Today, for lunch, I see again Cantaloupe...I must confess, that despite my very adventurous tastes, I'd never had Cantaloupe nor even heard of it until recently. I'm going to try it now though.

    As there are a large number of doctors and nurses from Philippines here too, having mango, (Philippines national fruit), papaya and pomelo are also possible.

    Today, I've therapy and rest. I'm depleted, completely.

    Have a beautiful day and weekend dear friends,

    Love,
    Ed
    xx

  • Porky Pies

    Which one of the following is a fib? Nine of them are correct, spot the untruth!!!

    1. The Bible, the world's best-selling book, is also the world's most shoplifted book.

    2. Someone paid $14,000 for the bra worn by Marilyn Monroe in the film 'Some Like It Hot'.

    3. Your tongue is the only muscle in your body that is attached at only one end.

    4. More than 1,000 different languages are spoken on the continent of Africa.

    5. In the U.S.A over eleven thousand people (up until the end of 2003) have visited a tortilla chip that appears to have the face of Jesus Christ burned into it?

    6. A kiss lasting one minute can burn more than 100 calories.

    7. Buckingham Palace in England has over six hundred rooms.

    8. There was once an undersea post office in the Bahamas.

    9. Abraham Lincoln's mother died when she drank the milk of a cow that grazed on poisonous snakeroot.

    10. After the death of Albert Einstein his brain was removed by a pathologist and put in a jar for future study.

  • Mother...

    mother

    in every effort I endeavour to make
    times indecision bring memories vivid
    in your arms my childhood rests
    memories lay in the warmth you gave
    for another day my heart still requests

    so selflessly your heart shared and gave
    more than you ever took for yourself
    shaping the happiest vista in my heart
    stretching for miles and for years
    now knowing that souvenirs are but a forepart

    wondering from the garden like a rodent
    my nature must be relearned somehow
    that part of me that is forever you
    warms even the icicle of fear
    thawing this testimony of hopes anew

    vanquished is my innocence and youth
    for the table turned on me long ago
    vociferousness is absent in honour
    for it is you I cling to still, as such
    things can only be learned when crossing the border

    forgive me for slubbering in melancholia
    my wish is happiness in sobriety
    but every path is tremulous and darkened
    I marvel at the ability to cross over in peace
    my hopes rest in your love unweakened.

    mother, forever dear, forever true, forever in my heart so blue.

    © 2008wensum24

  • Sorry

    The thin line is a difficult one
    to undertake
    to comprehend
    even harder when undone

    left to chance, in the hands of fate
    tugging one end
    pulling another
    the hearts eternal debate

    no nearer entering than parting
    in defence of both
    a life-threatening deficiency
    of heartfelt reality departing

    clutching life so hard it's breathless
    wanting so dearly
    for an answer that -
    my unhealthy moods become worthless

    yes, I'm pitiful in my disassembled state
    ready to admit my faults
    still able to recognise my errors
    I am but human, don't recriminate

    all I am becomes less each day
    in my acceptance
    my heart ricochets
    and I occasionally fall from my way

    medicinally pumped-up with parvanimity
    occasionally a break-out of emotion
    but an echo of the real gentler me
    my life consists simply of no enmity

    I am but a shadow of my former self
    the one that plays continually in my mind
    happy, vibrant with life
    but now...my soul must reinvent itself

    by wensum24
    09:55: 18-01-2008
    © 2008wensum24

  • Dealing with M.E. ??

    Morning dear friends,

    It is no surprise that after dealing with many health problems, the body becomes exhausted mentally and physically, and has to take it's toll somewhere, no matter how much resolve we believe we may possess, somewhere within...

    My doctor shyly told me a while ago, that I have 'Chronic Fatigue Syndrome' and left it at that.
    And it was down to the Pain Management Clinic to go out of their way, to tell me, full-on, that I have M.E..
    The clinic were supposed to go through the dealings with a broken spine, which had partly repaired, but will never be strong enough to support activities...however, they kindly went through my files and were VERY helpful in dealing with my emotional state regarding M.E. as nobody else had told me what it is, how to deal with it, and how to come to terms with it.
    It was more than a bombshell for me. (I had even begun self-harming this month too.)

    However, I feel it better to be open about such a thing, and to hell with the stigma attached to this mysterious illness.

    I'm only just 'entering into' the onset of M.E. and that is one reason for my previous post about the Lightning Process.

    However, in my mind, I still feel I can do as much as I ever could, but must somehow grow to realise that I never will.

    If there are any M.E. sufferers out there, how did you cope, at first?

    This is my primary concern at present. The medicine and valium that was injected into me gave such a potent lift a few days ago, that now I'm feeling a 'flattening' of effects day by day...and it's very hard indeed, because I can't be who I want to be...

    Love,
    Ed
    xx

  • Have yourself a go...

    1] What part of the body has the most rhythm?

    2] A farmer combined 2 compost heaps with 3 others. How many compost heaps does he have?

    3] What odd number becomes even when beheaded?

    4] Why is the letter E like London?

    5] What lives on its own substance and dies when it devours itself?

    6] "The beginning of eternity
    The end of time and space
    The beginning of every end,
    And the end of every place."

    7] "I never was, am always to be,
    No one ever saw me, nor ever will
    And yet I am the confidence of all
    To live and breathe on this terrestrial ball."

    8] "At night they come without being fetched,
    And by day they are lost without being stolen."

  • Would you be young again?

    A question my father continually brings up however well I'm feeling :) is one of youth!

    It struck me that many of my fellow patients are older than me, some very much older, and they unanimously say, emphatically, that they would certainly not wish to be young again in today's world. A clear 100%!!

    This of course goes against nature, as it is always a case of 'survival of the fittest' in the natural world, so to be ever-zestful is not only desirable, but a necessity.
    So what have we done wrong in our nanny state whereby nobody (it would appear), wished to return to their young bodies in our modern society.

    Even some 30-something's nearby who I have got to know fail to see the 'pull' of youth in the current climate...oh dear...

    What do you think my dear friends?

  • When all is used up...

    When all is used up...
    it empties
    before it ever filled up
    those silent captivities

    of hurt unfurling
    before my very eyes
    the world a whirling
    unable to surmise

    the devils work and whereabouts
    of disheartening grief 'unsprung'
    in elements of surprise casting doubts
    upon my emotional camber where I got stung

    fog now cancels the progressive path
    such postponement of hope is defenceless
    the unspoken weapon of dividing wrath
    leaving me rooted and numbingly branchless

    meaningless minutes pass unnoticed
    time is nothing when it passes in silence
    raiding continually where the heart's at it's remotest
    help...in the spirit of deepest condolence

    ragged are my feelings travelling in despair
    passing here and there, rallentando fashion
    am I gone, is it finished, is there no repair -
    an empty heart awaits another's warming compassion...

    © 2008wensum24

  • What keeps us going?

    Hello again dear friends,

    My day has been something of a struggle. These past three days have become progressively worse, and steadily more difficult, with movements being greatly restricted. However, I want to continue the momentum if possible, and not give in to the malaise and depression of some very unforeseen and unexpected hurdles I have encountered in my recent life, some this week.

    Thanks for everyones help regarding The Lightning Process, which gives me a lot to think about, as my fatigue is going to be longterm, this is certainly an option.

    It made me think though, what actually keeps you going dear friends?

    Is it motivation?
    Profession?
    Family?
    Self-belief?
    Love?
    Hope?
    Curiosity?
    Desire to seek a better life?
    Or, a wish to help the earth upon which we depend?

    Today, asking myself, I really am not sure of my answer.

    Take care everyone.

    Love,
    Ed
    xxx

  • The Lightning Process

    Good morning my dear friends,

    Again, thank you to all of you for supporting and encouraging me, it helps tremendously.

    I'm very, very much weaker today unfortunately as my thoughts turn to my mother...

    I've been 'offered' the opportunity of having hypnotherapy under the name of 'The Lightning Process' which has been suggested to help those with depleted energy, those in a very low state of health etc.
    I know virtually nothing about this, and wonder if any of you know much about it?

    What is it exactly?
    Is it a proven success?
    Do you recommend it?

    I've fought the cost out of the practitioner, and it is around £600 in total.

    It crosses my mind that my resolve has all been used up, and present circumstances are now eating away at other parts of my health/body. I need to explore my options.

    I'd be so grateful for any advice, help, recommendations from anyone, thank you so much!! :)

    It's a bugger of a day outside, and has "dank" written all over it...oh well, take care dear friends.

    Love,
    Ed
    xxx

  • For my mother...

    Jeff Buckley: Hallelujah

  • Gregorian: Send Me an Angel

    Empathy in the song...

  • Thank you again

    Good morning all~~

    It was sunny here, lucky for us, but rain coming fast...it's nice to think of such things again, as for so long, for too long, all I felt from the moment of being conscious, to the moment of 'travelling' in dreams/nightmares, ...all I felt was pain. If you can imagine numbness throughout the body, and yet, a pain forever etching it's way through the very heart of oneself...this was my lot for several months, and even now, continues to plough through my hopes.

    Only now have I regained enough belief again, at least two days ago I thought I had.
    If you'll allow me to write about such things, what ate away at my heart and soul, spirit and mind, for so long, was the predicament about life. Is the pain too great to sustain and is 'letting go' a better option, or is it right to fight and live.

    Still, to this second I don't know what has happened completely these past months, particularly through December and early January. Those days I think will be forever lost to my consciousness, perhaps just as well.

    Today, more than yesterday, it feels as if my life has altered in every conceivable way possible. Nothing from last year 'appears' the same anymore...perhaps it never will?

    Even a simple write up as this is draining me, but helping me, little by little.
    There is not only the physical pressure, but also the mental strain...only beginning to tell.

    Take care and be well!!

    Love,
    Ed

    xxx

  • I'm alive, yes, yes, yes, I think!

    Hello dear friends,

    I am alive, and healing, albeit slowly. Thanks for everyone's kindness and care.
    I've come through something that I still do not fully understand, and cannot begin to comprehend. I awaken at night disbelieving my own heartbeats and bloodflows.
    It takes a lot of convincing to appreciate I am living. However, I must undergo a succession of therapies, more minor treatments, and hypnotherapy for my depleted reserves.

    My dear father has 'held the fort' while I was 'away' which was a precious comfort for me, as he could keep you all informed.
    It's at times like these that you really learn who your true friends are.

    Rest is of the essence now!

    Love to you all,

    Ed
    xxx

    Airwave: "United We Were" ...this song and video have come to mean so much to me.

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