Empathy in the song...

Good morning all~~

It was sunny here, lucky for us, but rain coming fast...it's nice to think of such things again, as for so long, for too long, all I felt from the moment of being conscious, to the moment of 'travelling' in dreams/nightmares, ...all I felt was pain. If you can imagine numbness throughout the body, and yet, a pain forever etching it's way through the very heart of oneself...this was my lot for several months, and even now, continues to plough through my hopes.

Only now have I regained enough belief again, at least two days ago I thought I had.
If you'll allow me to write about such things, what ate away at my heart and soul, spirit and mind, for so long, was the predicament about life. Is the pain too great to sustain and is 'letting go' a better option, or is it right to fight and live.

Still, to this second I don't know what has happened completely these past months, particularly through December and early January. Those days I think will be forever lost to my consciousness, perhaps just as well.

Today, more than yesterday, it feels as if my life has altered in every conceivable way possible. Nothing from last year 'appears' the same anymore...perhaps it never will?

Even a simple write up as this is draining me, but helping me, little by little.
There is not only the physical pressure, but also the mental strain...only beginning to tell.

Take care and be well!!

Love,
Ed

xxx